Test a Battery or a Battery of Tests?

Test of Battery or Battery of Tests?

Quick story: So here I am at West Marine looking for a battery for my boat. "Can I help you find something?" the salesman asks, "Yes you can. I need a Deep Cycle marine battery for my 21 foot Bayliner with a 5.0 Mercury V-8 outdrive." "Well is it a 24" 27" 31"? Do you have the old battery with you?" "No it's in West Virginia and I need the battery to get my boat out of the garage. Can you look it up?" "Sorry we have no way of doing that." This is a marine store, with everything under the sun for boats, and they have no data base for marine battery applications? The guy in the aisle next to me says, "Save yourself some money and go up two blocks to PASCO, they will know what you need for half the price." I thank him and head out to the parking lot.

I go back roads since the Reach the Beach crowd has Rt. 50 jammed up, and I pull into PASCO. Same thing, no way of knowing what size battery without the old one. Hmmmmm. "Maybe I will just call the place I bought the boat." Give me a minute, and I step away from the counter. Hmmm. Now if I could just remember the NAME of the place I bought the boat. It WAS 8 YEARS AGO and I can't remember names for shit. Clarks, Ted's, Bob's...damn. Then I was struck by an epiphany of sorts. When I left the house it was 85 degrees and I had the Jag top down. I wanted a white T-shirt. What white T-Shirt do I have? THE ONE THAT BILL'S BOATWORKS GAVE ME WHEN I BOUGHT THE BOAT. So I look down at the round insignia on my left breast and there it is BILL'S BOATWORKS. Smart phone, yellow pages and call and "Parts" and "24 inch Deep Cycle." Thank you. And I return to the counter a better man for my smart phone. Perfect fit, a smart phone for a dumb ass.